I've waited so much. Waited for someone who wasn't right for me in the first place.I endedup with nothing. I can tell you right now, I'm done waiting.
Jump&&Fall.
And you get that goofy grin on your face. You half want it to go away, but half of you loves that something can make you so happy.
(via jannetje)
Today I lost one of the very closest people to me. I lost my twin, my best friend, my other half, my everything. I usually would go to her when stuff like this happened, we would sit and just cry together. Now I don’t know what i’m going to do. I don’t know how I’m going to get through this without you. Death leaves a heart ache no one can heal. I remember the plans we made when we graduated. We were going to get a dorm together at Iowa State. It was gonna be filled with bright colors and fuzzy furniture. God, I miss you. This is SO unfair. Every memory I have with you, every song we listen and jammed to in the car, every little detail I’m going to cheerish forever. I honestly cannot wrap my head around this. I keep going to call you or text you. I’ve looked at our signatures in the cement so many times. And our pictures. Everything. It’s so hard to help everyone, when I can’t even help myself. I’m trying to be strong for you and not cry. I did good for a lot of today, but once I start crying I just can’t stop. I love you so much. More than you will ever know. l feel like there’s a dent in my heart, like only half of me is here.. I can slowly start to feel myself start to slip, start to panic. I honeslty don’t know what I’m going to do. With myself, withmy life, with ANYTHING. I’m so lost. I feel sick and cold. I’m not going to be able to handle myself at your funeral or visitation. I apologize right now. I know you don’t want me to feel this way and you want me to move on and be happy, live life. But the thing is, you were apart of my future. We planned to move far away together, to graduate together, to do EVERYTHING together.. And now we can’t. It’s gonna take me awhile to be happy again. I love you, Justice Marie.
